![]() Traditionally, both sets of parents get a say on who is invited to a wedding – particularly if they are contributing to the wedding fund. To soften the blow, you could arrange a more relaxed dinner or a low-key party after the main event so that everyone who wants to celebrate with you gets the chance - if you haven't had enough of wedding planning yet. Try not to feel guilty – remember that every guest is an extra chair, dinner, slice of cake and favour that you’ll have to pay for. Where possible, start mentioning to those who might think they’re getting an invite that your wedding will a very small one as early as possible, before their expectations get out of hand. If you’re having an intimate ceremony or a destination wedding, maybe the answer to that question is just the A-list, and that’s okay – it’s your day, and your choice. Even if you don’t have an exact location locked down, you probably know what kind of day you want – will you be at a big country house, a cosy barn, on the beach? How many people can your dream setting feasibly hold? Can your budget stretch to that many? Work Out How Many Guests You Can Realistically Affordĭeciding on a venue and a guest list go hand in hand – you can’t fully figure out the latter if the vision for the former isn’t set. Everyone else gets an invite if space and budget allows – and don’t be afraid to allocate some as evening guests only. Highlight them somehow and know that no matter how the list goes from here, they stay very firmly on it, no exceptions. However you shape it, the message is the same: you simply wouldn’t get married without these people there. Separate Out Your Top Tier GuestsĬall them whatever you want to: the A-list, the non-negotiables, the must-haves. This is your master list but now it’s time to start trimming it down. Start with immediate family and really close friends and work outwards, including colleagues, school mates and distant relatives, down to fair-weather acquaintances, their partners, children, the lot. Sit down with your partner and compile a list of every single person who you would invite to your wedding if money and space were infinite – spreadsheet, pen and paper, however it makes sense to you most. Sometimes, you have to go big to get smaller. Write a List of Everyone You’d Even Consider Inviting Don’t know where to start? Don’t panic – because we do… 1. If this sounds like you right now, know this: you are not alone, and other couples have faced the same dilemmas for decades. Initially, it seems fun – what could be bad about the thought of everyone you love joining you to celebrate your big day? But phrases like ‘well, we did go to their wedding’ and ‘she’ll be so upset if I don’t ask him’ start creeping into the conversation and, all too soon, things descend into chaos. You’ll need to know rough numbers, you see, to start thinking about your budget and looking for a venue that’s the right size. ![]() Putting together your wedding guest list is one of the first jobs on your wedding checklist, usually before you’ve even thought about booking a venue.
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